The Big Ideas of 2012

The American Dream

I have no deviant desires.
The American Dream
Brent Humphreys

Available in: English, Español, Français, Türkçe.

I am married and I live in the suburbs.

My street looks like every street you have seen in every commercial since 1957.Ever since I first came here, I couldn’t think of living anywhere else.

I have two children – both bright – a girl and a boy. I can’t wait to watch them grow up.

I love my car. My impeccable home. I love being fit, and I love a good day’s work. I love being straight and never confused about my sexual identity. I love my wife. I love being monogamous.

I love my neighbors who come out on Saturday mornings and cut their grass, and chitchat to me while we washdown our cars and driveways.

Every second Saturday, after the kids are safely off to bed, I take a Viagra. My wife and I will then finish watching our Saturday night crime drama, and then for the next 20 or so minutes I remind my wife of why she really married me in the first place. After which she usually takes a Sleep Eze-type product because she says she likes getting a good Saturday night sleep.

The kids are always up early on Sunday mornings, diligently doing their homework at the kitchen table, while Mom bakes cookies and makes bread in her new breadmaker. That’s when the kitchen really shines. We don’t go to church, except for the high holidays, but we still know we are blessed.

My wife booked us a trip to the Caribbean. She said we could get double airmiles if we put the entire trip on our VISA card.

When our neighbors ask how the trip was I tell them it was brilliant, just as theirs had been. It’s not a lie.

Sure, we all comb our hair the same way, and we are a little obsessed with dandelions and flossing our teeth. And so what if we all like to go to the same movies, watch the same TV, and eat the same popcorn. It’s a good life here.

Uncomplicated.

I’m not a complicated man.

I have no deviant desires.

—Sherwood Hinze

232 comments on the article “The American Dream”

Displaying 121 - 130 of 232

Page 13 of 24

Anonymous

The whole anarchist/leftist fringe grab bag. Lasn doesn't stake out one fringe ideology. He tends to focus on hyperbolic condemnation of the status quo while flirting with a potpourri of radicalism. He's even run an essay by Pentti Linkola, a Finnish eco-rad who advocates nuclear genocide as population control. I think he's more of a "watch the world burn" nihilist than an ideologue.

Anonymous

The whole anarchist/leftist fringe grab bag. Lasn doesn't stake out one fringe ideology. He tends to focus on hyperbolic condemnation of the status quo while flirting with a potpourri of radicalism. He's even run an essay by Pentti Linkola, a Finnish eco-rad who advocates nuclear genocide as population control. I think he's more of a "watch the world burn" nihilist than an ideologue.

Chris Honeycutt

Okay, Hugh Hefner ran Norman Mailer. Does that mean that Hef's into pedophilia?

Could be the political version of a shock jock. Or just want change. Or be a militant supporter of free speech, who knows?

What's his opinion? That's what I want to know.

Chris Honeycutt

Okay, Hugh Hefner ran Norman Mailer. Does that mean that Hef's into pedophilia?

Could be the political version of a shock jock. Or just want change. Or be a militant supporter of free speech, who knows?

What's his opinion? That's what I want to know.

Anonymous

I think it's different. If a right-wing magazine ran an essay by a neo-Nazi calling for racist genocide, even if they said that it was just a thought exercise or some such, I don't think I would buy a subscription. And if the same right-wing magazine called for protests against Wall St shenanigans or something else I did agree with, I wouldn't join that particular protest group. Some ideas are so repellent that even flirting with them is suspect.

Anonymous

I think it's different. If a right-wing magazine ran an essay by a neo-Nazi calling for racist genocide, even if they said that it was just a thought exercise or some such, I don't think I would buy a subscription. And if the same right-wing magazine called for protests against Wall St shenanigans or something else I did agree with, I wouldn't join that particular protest group. Some ideas are so repellent that even flirting with them is suspect.

Chris Honeycutt

"Pbbt." I'm a good Christian who writes terrorists and serial killers as a hobby. Also studies the works of revolutionaries, both pacifist and non-pacifist.

The concept of "forbidden thought" irks me. Or chills me, depending on who is espousing the philosophy.

Like defining the philosophical world as "left" and "right." The Nazis weren't "right," not really, not by today's standards. In many ways, they were "left."

Chris Honeycutt

"Pbbt." I'm a good Christian who writes terrorists and serial killers as a hobby. Also studies the works of revolutionaries, both pacifist and non-pacifist.

The concept of "forbidden thought" irks me. Or chills me, depending on who is espousing the philosophy.

Like defining the philosophical world as "left" and "right." The Nazis weren't "right," not really, not by today's standards. In many ways, they were "left."

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